# For M2



## jwkimber45 (May 6, 2006)

Guys' Rules **************

At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down.

Finally, the guys' side of the story.
I must admit, it's pretty good.)
We always hear "the rules"
From the female side.

Now here are the rules from the male side.
These are our rules!
Please note... these are all numbered "1"
ON PURPOSE!

1. Men are NOT mind readers.

1. Learn to work the toilet seat.
You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down.
We need it up, you need it down.
You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.

1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon
or the changing of the tides.
Let it be.

1. Shopping is NOT a sport.
And no, we are never going to think of it that way.

1. Crying is blackmail.

1. Ask for what you want.
Let us be clear on this one:
Subtle hints do not work!
Strong hints do not work!
Obvious hints do not work!
Just say it!

1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do.
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a Problem.
See a doctor.

1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.

1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't Expect us to act like soap opera guys.

1. If you think you're fat, you probably are.
Don't ask us.

1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of them makes you sad or angry, then we meant the other one

1. You can either ask us to do something
Or tell us how you want it done.
Not both.
If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials.

1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.

1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.

1. If it itches, it will be scratched.
We do that.

1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like nothing's wrong.
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle, besides we know you will bring it up again later.

1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer you don't want to hear.

1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine...Really.

1. Don't ask us what we're th inking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation,
or golf.

1. You have enough clothes.

1. You have too many shoes.

1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!

1. Thank you for reading this.
Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;

But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.


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## Rustycompass (Jun 25, 2006)

Amen Brother..... :supz:


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## MissouriMule (Jul 6, 2006)

Okay....and this is addressed to me because....? :mrgreen: 

Come on, you guys know there are only five (5) rules:

1. No matter what, you are wrong and we are right.

2. No matter what, you are wrong and we are right.

3. No matter what, you are wrong and we are right.

4. No matter what, you are wrong and we are right.

5. No matter what, you are wrong and we are right.

Oh yeah, and we will cry whenever it is to our advantage to do so. :smt022 

So I guess there are six rules! 

Personally, I rely on Rule #6 very heavily! :smt077


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## Charlie (May 13, 2006)

ROFLMAO
:smt044 :smt045 :smt044 :smt045 :smt044 :smt045 :smt044 :smt045 :smt044 :smt045​


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## js (Jun 29, 2006)

rustycompass said:


> Amen Brother..... :supz:


+1


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## Rustycompass (Jun 25, 2006)

*Happy Friday...*

M2, I ask because your are one of our female members, nothing personal... okay...? 
The sixth number 1 is my favorite. 
Why won't you girls just TELL us what you want , need or would like? Wouldn't that would make things so much easier on everyone?... :mrgreen:
Stop with the hints already... :smt082 just say it, we wouldn't mind, infact I would love it. That why we can get on to other things.... you girls would be happy & I wouldn't be in the DOG HOUSE..... I hate the dog house, the dog house sux...

Why does this happen... ?


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## MissouriMule (Jul 6, 2006)

rustycompass said:


> Why won't you girls just TELL us what you want , need or would like? Wouldn't that would make things so much easier on everyone?...


Easier, perhaps. But not as much fun! :smt062

:smt077

PS No offense taken in any way, shape or form. You too, jwkimber45.


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## Charlie (May 13, 2006)

It's part of a bigger plot!


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## MissouriMule (Jul 6, 2006)

Charlie said:


> It's part of a bigger plot!


But you guys make it so easy!! 

Puppy dog eyes, crocodile tears and we get what we want.

And of course, we control THAT (you know what I mean). :smt077

You guys lost before the game even started! :smt077  :smt077


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## Rustycompass (Jun 25, 2006)

MissouriMule said:


> But you guys make it so easy!!
> 
> Puppy dog eyes, crocodile tears and we get what we want.
> 
> ...


 i know, i know... :goofy:


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## J.R. (Jul 6, 2006)

MissouriMule said:


> But you guys make it so easy!!
> 
> Puppy dog eyes, crocodile tears and we get what we want.
> 
> ...


FORGET IT HONEY,I'VE BEEN MARRIED FOR 23PLUS YEARS!! AHHHH "yes dear what did you want???? PLUS bitch,bitch bitch.etc....................... J.R.


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## MissouriMule (Jul 6, 2006)

J.R. said:


> FORGET IT HONEY,I'VE BEEN MARRIED FOR 23PLUS YEARS!! AHHHH "yes dear what did you want???? PLUS bitch,bitch bitch.etc....................... J.R.


Might as well tattoo "Yes, Dear" on your forehead. It'll just make it easier.


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## Rustycompass (Jun 25, 2006)

MissouriMule said:


> Might as well tattoo "Yes, Dear" on your forehead. It'll just make it easier.


 OUCH..... :smt037


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## scooter (May 9, 2006)

GOD Im glad I got divorced young.:mrgreen: :mrgreen: :mrgreen: :mrgreen: :mrgreen: :mrgreen: :mrgreen: :mrgreen: :mrgreen: :mrgreen: :mrgreen: :mrgreen: :mrgreen: :mrgreen: :mrgreen: :mrgreen: :mrgreen: :mrgreen: :mrgreen: :mrgreen:


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## jwkimber45 (May 6, 2006)

MissouriMule said:


> And of course, we control THAT (you know what I mean). :smt077
> 
> You guys lost before the game even started! :smt077  :smt077


Yeah, thats not fair either........:smt022


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