# Red Green Suspenders



## Steve M1911A1 (Feb 6, 2008)

OK, I've officially entered old age.
I now wear a pair of Red Green suspenders ("braces," for you English majors).
These suspenders are entirely appropriate, since, like Red Green himself, I am a fervent worshipper in the church of duck tape.

I now have serious arthritis issues in both shoulders, both fore-arms, and my left hand.
It is occasionally so bad that Jean has to help me dress...and undress. (That's somewhat more fun.)
Thus the suspenders, which hold my pants up while I tuck my shirt in, and which make up for my being unable to cinch my belt as tightly as I once could.

Red Green suspenders are quite wide, at 2", which makes them comfortable, although they are not as elegant as proper gentleman's braces. This is particularly true because they cross in back, rather than forming a classic "Y." It is also true because they clip onto my pants, rather than using suspender buttons.

Bad things start happening, when one passes age 75. (I'm almost 78.)
But my doctor tells me that they get better after age 80.
I can hardly wait.


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## woolieworm (Nov 26, 2007)

Welcome to the club, been wearing them for years. My shape makes belt wear futile. Does make pocket carry necessary though.


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## pblanc (Mar 3, 2015)

I don't waste my money on silly things like suspenders.

I use Duck tape instead.


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## BackyardCowboy (Aug 27, 2014)

Oh, Steve, I certainly hope they are the *Official* red/green suspenders.

(If not, here's where to get them: Red Green Suspenders )


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## Steve M1911A1 (Feb 6, 2008)

BackyardCowboy said:


> Oh, Steve, I certainly hope they are the *Official* red/green suspenders...


"My blushes, Watson..."
They are _not_ official Red Green suspenders!
(_Mea culpa, mea culpa, mea maxima culpa!_)

The official Red Green suspenders hook onto one's belt.
I do not want that. I want my _pants_ to be supported.
So I bought knockoffs which clamp onto my pants' waistband, instead.


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## Cait43 (Apr 4, 2013)

For those that wear suspenders here are some with a different way to attach them so you don't have take off wearing apparel to us the toilet......
Welcome to the Perry Suspenders eStore


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## Steve M1911A1 (Feb 6, 2008)

Perry Suspenders makes/sells the official Red Green jobs.
It is unfortunate that the Perry design has only the terminals which hook to the belt, not to the pants.

As previously stated, I wanted suspenders which attach to the pants, specifically.

Other people will very likely be completely satisfied by the Perry design. Not I.


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## paratrooper (Feb 1, 2012)

Suspenders? I thought only old farts used those? :watching:


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## Steve M1911A1 (Feb 6, 2008)

Wholly shucking fit!
I *am* an old fart. And I am gettin' older, and fartier, by the day.

I'm a month short of 78, which is close enough to 80 for folk music.
And if you're gonna make jokes about my age, you had better include my arthritis in the conversation.
If you don't include my arthritis, it might get angry.
And you really don't want to deal with angry arthritis!
Not the kind I have, anyway.


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## paratrooper (Feb 1, 2012)

Steve M1911A1 said:


> Wholly shucking fit!
> I *am* an old fart. And I am gettin' older, and fartier, by the day.
> 
> I'm a month short of 78, which is close enough to 80 for folk music.
> ...


Well crap, if I had known you were that old, I would have shown you a lot more respect a long time ago. :smt033


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## Steve M1911A1 (Feb 6, 2008)

I don't get no respect...


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## paratrooper (Feb 1, 2012)

Steve M1911A1 said:


> I don't get no respect...


Well.....now that I know how old you are, I'm gonna try to send a little extra your way. :smt023


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## BackyardCowboy (Aug 27, 2014)

Steve M1911A1 said:


> I'm a month short of 78, which is close enough to 80 for folk music.


Cue theme music from Deliverance


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## Steve M1911A1 (Feb 6, 2008)

BackyardCowboy said:


> Cue theme music from Deliverance


Dang!
I used to be able to play _some_ of that.

Now, my fingers are so arthritic...(How arthritic is that, daddy?)...that I'm thinking about giving my banjo away!


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## bigjohn56 (Jan 26, 2013)

Still okay enough to squeeze a trigger though, I would bet! :smt1099


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## Steve M1911A1 (Feb 6, 2008)

bigjohn56 said:


> Still okay enough to squeeze a trigger though, I would bet! :smt1099


Just freakin' barely!
Today, my left hand turned in its resignation. And my left knee is on strike.

But when the wind dies down, things'll be better. A little.


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## Cait43 (Apr 4, 2013)

BackyardCowboy said:


> Cue theme music from Deliverance


Dueling Banjos


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## Goldwing (Nov 5, 2014)

I'll bet this isn't the first time you've been suspended.:anim_lol:

GW


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## paratrooper (Feb 1, 2012)

So.....what color are they?

Red or green? I don't know much about suspenders. Does it show? :watching:


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## Steve M1911A1 (Feb 6, 2008)

Red Green is a fictional character who had his own eponymous Canadian TV show, a few years back.
He wore suspenders which had one red strap, and one green one.
Each episode included a funny sit-com skit, and then a shop-project which featured lots of duck tape.
It all centered about a fictional fraternal lodge, The Possums, somewhere in rural Canada.

The series was well written and superbly acted, and always very laugh-out-loud funny.

In one show, they duck-taped together an airplane, and flew it off...with passengers.
It got lost, of course.
So some lodge member suggested that they call the Canadian Air Force.
Red Green looked at his watch, and said, "Nope. It's after five o'clock. He's gone home."


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## BackyardCowboy (Aug 27, 2014)

Steve M1911A1 said:


> Red Green is a fictional character who had his own eponymous Canadian TV show, a few years back.
> He wore suspenders which had one red strap, and one green one.
> Each episode included a funny sit-com skit, and then a shop-project which featured lots of duck tape.
> It all centered about a fictional fraternal lodge, The Possums, somewhere in rural Canada.
> ...


Who said he's "fictional"? 
Decide for yourself, Don't let others make your opinion for you! Only the Government should do that.

Website here: Red Green - The Official Red Green Web Site 
Canada's answer to the Three Stooges. 
You can watch episodes from the site or look them up on You Tube (Like here: https://video.search.yahoo.com/yhs/...=yhs-mozilla-004&hspart=mozilla&hsimp=yhs-004 )


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## Steve M1911A1 (Feb 6, 2008)

BackyardCowboy said:


> ...Don't let others make your opinion for you! Only the Government should do that...


 :anim_lol: :anim_lol: :anim_lol:


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## Steve M1911A1 (Feb 6, 2008)

*This is important!*
Read it!

I do not have arthritis.
I have _Polymyalgia Rheumatica_.
It's a *treatable* disease.

I have begun taking prednisone, an inexpensive, generic steroid. I take it orally, in the morning.
It does the trick! This is my second day of treatment, and already I feel at least 50% better.

My left hand, which had previously tendered its resignation, has rejoined my arm, and they seem to be working well together.
My left knee, which had gone on strike, has left the solidarity of the picket line, and is back, working properly at its old, um, stand.
My shoulders and back are almost pain-free, and last night I had a full eight hours of real sleep for the first time in months.

On my first day of treatment, I dropped something to the floor and, without thinking, bent down and picked it up. I haven't been able to do that for more than three months.
Last night, I undressed myself. This morning, I dressed myself. Sounds simple; but to me, it's a real breakthrough.

If you have pernicious aches and pains that just won't go away, seem to be getting worse and worse, and are making you feel old before your time, ask your doctor about _Polymyalgia Rheumatica_.

(If this goes on, I may be able to return to carrying my little pocket-size AMT .45 Backup!)


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## CW (Mar 20, 2015)

I'm a man. I can change. If I have to. I guess.

QUANDO OMNI FLUNKUS MORITATI. 

(that means the duct tape didn't work)



Glad the meds are helping. I take it Hap Shaughnessy's advice was wanting.


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## Shipwreck (Jan 26, 2006)

pblanc said:


> I don't waste my money on silly things like suspenders.
> 
> I use Duck tape instead.


I like that


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## paratrooper (Feb 1, 2012)

Colorful Duct Tape - Walmart.com

Talk about some choices...........:watching:


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## pic (Nov 14, 2009)

I've been asking Santa for an indoor Hot Tub. 

Santa said they will not fit down the chimney, :smt022


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## Steve M1911A1 (Feb 6, 2008)

...Then ask Santa for a bigger chimney!


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## pic (Nov 14, 2009)

This style comes unassembled. That's the scary part , lol.

Don't know if I would even bother getting dressed some days.

I already asked for a bigger Chimney. It's Still the same size.

Cedar Hot Tub FAQ | Canadian Hot Tubs Inc.


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## Steve M1911A1 (Feb 6, 2008)

pic said:


> This style comes unassembled. That's the scary part , lol.
> 
> Don't know if I would even bother getting dressed some days.
> 
> ...


We have friends on this island who have one of those.
They're about five years older than we. He's a retired anthropologist, and, like Jean, she's a retired dancer - and also a Jungian psychotherapist. They use their cedar hot tub quite a lot, and they never invite anyone to join them in it. No, I don't wonder why. I _know_ why.
When I think of them, disporting themselves in their cedar hot tub, I start thinking about one of our own. And then I think of the upkeep, and the thought to own one evaporates in the imagined steam.

We have other friends who have one of something similar. It's essentially a Magnum-size, firewood-heated wine barrel. It's almost Steam-Punk!
About half of the tub is dedicated to the watertight stove, with a thin wooden separator to keep you from contacting the hot metal. The stove feeds, breathes, and exhausts at its top. Every so often, you have to open a trap-door and drop in a quarter-split, 16" log segment.
That's all very nice, but the whole contraption needs a half-day to warm up from cold. During that time, you gotta keep it fed, or its little fire goes out.
And then there's the algæ.
No, thanks.


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